Dumpster Diving

"Bywater Constabulary Satellite Office, Ruby speaking, how my I help you?"

"There is a woman in the alley behind my place digging in the dumpster!"

"Please hold while I transfer your call to the dispatcher."

"Thank you."

After completing the call transfer, Ruby hung up the phone and shook her head. "Imagine being reduced to digging in dumpsters!" she thought.

As it was her final hour at the constabulary for the day, she decided to give the floor a go over with the vacuum before heading home. "Blimey!" she said as she moved the shredder from against the wall, finding a small hill of paper shreddings on the floor behind it. She attempted to vacuum them, but the vacuum cleaner preferred to spread them around instead. That was when she noticed the vacuum cleaner's dust container being full.

She removed the dust container and headed outside. As she reached up into the dumpster and shook the container into it she heard a loud thump. Something larger than paper shreddings and dust went into the receptical. Ruby stood on her toes to look inside. Resting on the top of the piles of debris she saw the HEPA filter for the vacuum cleaner, just out of reach, pretty as you please.

Ruby chided herself, "I am such a barmy idiot!" She doubled herself over the edge of the dumpster, and she fruitlessly attempted to reach the filter. She picked up a nearby stick and tried to force it within in reach, only to push it further down into the pile of refuse. "Oh! blood and sand!" she cussed as she went back into the building and grabbed folding step stool and a plastic hanger. She returned to the mouth of the dumpster and climbed on the step stool. After approximately 10 minutes of maneuvering the filter about the dumpter, she was at last able to hook the end of it with the hanger, and save it from it's would-be casket.

When she got back into the building, she checked for phone messages.

"I imagined someone calling in to report a woman outside of the constabulary, dumpster diving!"